Happy people and happy children have high self-esteem. They are content and they have reasonable goals that they work to meet. When they fail at something they don’t get in a mad, depressive panic they think about what went wrong and try to change it so that next time it will be better.
This self-esteem or trust in themselves that happy children or happy people have doesn’t necessarily come naturally. They have either seen it work for others or someone has guided them through this process. They have been guided to feel in control of their goals and the way in which they pursue them. Their goals haven’t been dictated by others, they have set them themselves.
Self-esteem is a trust that you have with yourself. That you can do this!
“In order to see our son differently, (we) had to be differently.” States Stephen Covey in is book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.
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“Hands down the best way to help anyone close to you is to help yourself first. You are not doing anyone any favours if you aren’t looking after YOU.”
People open up to loved ones they admire, they emulate people they respect and they take advice from friends they value.
As a mother, teacher or mentor of any kind you do your best teaching when you are living your advice and being positive. Of course I don’t mean being perfect, I mean accepting that you’re human and trying your best at life.
Kids form their inner dialogue from their parents, family members and teachers. It is important that you as a mentor talk positively about yourself. Do this out loud whilst the child can hear you, this helps create their own dialogue and their own self talk.
Self talk is something we all do, we need to teach our kids to do it right and to do it in a positive way. It is up to you to model this, just like it is important to model healthy lifestyle choices and to model healthy relationships.
You might not see a difference straight away, but you are teaching them valuable life skills that they will carry into adulthood. Help them by helping yourself.
If you would like to know more on this topic read my other blog post 7 ways to be happy everyday and Guilt: the little devil on your shoulder.
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